I've been reflecting on life recently. I turn 30 this year, and have been thinking how my attitudes to various things have changed over the years. If one thing in this world is certain, is that everything and everyone changes. I know some may find change difficult. People can also believe that their 'personality' is such that they cannot change. But if a person was to really consider what they were like 5 years ago, and compare it to themselves today, then many things will have changed, for better or for worse.
10 years ago, I would never have thought I would be the way I am today. Once I made the decision to do something about my stammering, it has been a fascinating journey of growth, trying different things; seeing what worked for me and what didn't. Over the years, frustration and negativity has been there, but I've learnt that such feelings will arise, but I'm at choice as to whether I want to react to them. I guess, this has been one of the key things that I've learnt through study of self-help and experience - that I'm at choice as to how I'm going to react to the world, situations, events, people and so on. When previously I thought that I was being blocked by external things, I've realised that I the only thing that was blocking me was myself. I was not using my mind in the right manner, because I hadn't learnt to use it properly.
Over the last decade my attitude towards stuttering has also changed greatly. I'm beginning to see that having a stammer is one of my unique characteristics that doesn't need to be resisted, like I used to. Giving up the need to always control situations has also been liberating. Why control things we can't control anyway? What is the point creating all the unnecessary anxiety, wondering whether I will block in this situation or not? It takes up so much energy to do so. Instead of fighting 'perceived' difficult life situations, accept them I say, as the way things are. Rise above them, by realising that it is the nature of things, which don't have to be acted upon (unless you choose to do so). It makes like so much more easier and interesting.
I've learnt that a person can stammer, and still be confident. A person can block and not have to prove anything to anyone. A person can have issues with stammering and still lead the life they dreamt of. A person can achieve whatever they want.
One tip which I have picked up through self-help material and one, that I want to share with you through my own experience is to write down your goals in life. Writing down what you want to do in life, be it getting a better job, or become more fluent, or take up a new hobby, learn a new skill or whatever it is, has a wonderful way of becoming reality. Those who are skeptic, may want to give it a try. You might just surprise yourself - no joke.
